How I Designed a Career I Actually Like (and How You Can Too)
47.3% of you have never heard of career design. Let’s fix that. Plus, the 5 career design principles that changed everything for me.
“Better for your career” is a trap.
The other day, I got a DM that stopped me in my tracks.
“I have two job options. One is the direction my heart wants to take, and the other is the direction that’s better for my career. I know I should take the one that’s better for my career, but it’s so much worse for my mental health.”
And I couldn’t stop thinking about that sentence.
What is ‘better for my career’ if the cost is ‘my mental health’?
That’s the illusion so many of us have been sold:
That success is earned through sacrifice.
That ambition and well-being can’t coexist.
That if you really care about your career, you’ll suck it up and do the thing that drains you.
But what if we’ve been measuring “career success” with a broken ruler?
What if your most aligned career path doesn’t look like climbing the ladder faster, but choosing a job you don’t dread on Sunday nights?
What if the bravest move you could make isn't powering through… but pausing long enough to ask: What kind of life do I actually want to build?
That’s where career design comes in.
Career Design 101
This week on Instagram, I asked: “Have you heard of career design before?”
Almost half of you said, “Never — but I’m super interested!”
Another 29% said, “I’ve heard of it, but I don’t know how to do it.”
And honestly? That tracks.
Career design is one of those buzzy phrases that sounds cool — but most of us were never taught how to actually do it.
We were taught to choose a major, get a job, and be grateful for the paycheck. Put your head down, grind through the tough days, and one day you’ll get to retire and actually enjoy your life.
But what if you want more?
More clarity. More autonomy. More meaning. More you in your work.
That’s where career design comes in. It’s about reversing the equation — starting with the life you want, and designing a career that supports it. Not the other way around.
So let’s get clear:
Career design isn’t just for entrepreneurs or influencers. It’s for anyone who wants to:
Love how you spend your workday
Build a career that allows you to do the functional work that keeps you in the flow, protecting your energy and momentum to also live your dream life
Stop dreading those Sunday evenings once and for all
It’s about building your career intentionally, around your strengths, your values, and your real life wish list. Career design is for everybody. And yes, that includes you.
In the rest of this email, I’m going to show you the 5 career design principles that helped me rebuild my career from the inside out.
(And how you can start applying them to your life this week. Know someone at a career crossroads? You’re going to want to forward this to them.)
How I Designed a Career I Actually Like (and How You Can Too)
Let me take you back.
There was a time I had the "right" job on paper. I had the salary, the calendar full of meetings, the respectable title. I had growth opportunities galore and leadership in an industry I thought was pretty sexy.
But I also had a pit in my stomach every Sunday night single morning as I drove to work. A constant whisper of, "Is this really it?"
I was performing success. But I wasn’t living it. That was my wake-up call.
It took me 13 months of what I like to call “career purgatory” to find the courage to completely redesign my career and life… and once I did it, I couldn’t believe I didn’t take the leap sooner.
Here’s what it looked like: I stopped optimizing for what looked good on LinkedIn. And I started designing a career that felt good in my actual life.
It didn't happen overnight. But it did work.
Today, I get to do work that lights me up: creating daily, helping people through big decisions, building programs, writing, speaking, teaching, and dreaming. And most importantly? Living a life that actually feels like mine.
Here are the 5 career design principles that changed everything for me, and how you can use them to build a career you actually like, too.
1. Your life is the main character.
Not your job title. Not your resume. Not what other people think sounds impressive.
Career design starts by asking: What kind of life do I want to live?
Where do I want to live?
How do I want to spend my days?
What matters most to me outside of work?
Instead of trying to fit your life around your work, flip it. Fit your work around the life you want to live.
Try this: Make a list of 5 things you want your life to include, then gut-check your current career path against that list.
2. Your body knows before your brain.
I used to push through stress, fatigue, and red flags.
(I literally answered the phone from a hospital bed, hooked up to a heart monitor, because my boss called me. I was that girl.)
Now? I listen.
When your body says "this isn't it" (with anxiety, burnout, tension, or an emergency trip to the ER), it’s not a failure to override. It's wisdom to honor.
Your nervous system is your secret strategy tool. A regulated body makes clearer decisions, holds boundaries, and can actually enjoy success when it comes.
Try this: Check in with your body after work this week. What does it tell you? Content? Grateful? Peaceful? Or are you cancelling your life plans because work took too much out of you? Take notes.
3. If it’s not working, it’s not personal.
Leaving a job can feel like a breakup.
Even if the decision is strictly professional, made with your future and well-being in mind, it still hits deep. You’ve likely poured hours, energy, care, and creativity into your role. You’ve built relationships. You’ve had moments of pride. You’ve maybe even fought to make it work longer than you should have.
So when you realize it’s time to go, it’s common to feel some feelings:
To feel like you’re abandoning something.
Or worse, like you’re throwing all of your hard work away.
But here’s the truth: if it’s not working, it’s not personal.
You are allowed to outgrow roles, companies, and even identities you once loved. That doesn’t mean you failed. That doesn’t mean you’re flaky. That doesn’t mean you’re giving up.
It means you’re evolving. And the times we are most likely to outgrow our jobs? It’s when we’re going through major life transitions, too: engagement, marriage, moving in with a partner, growing your family, taking care of an elderly parent…
The times in life that grow you the most are often also the times in life when your career will fit the least.
Careers, like people, have seasons. What once fit you perfectly may now feel tight, misaligned, or even suffocating. And that’s not a moral failing. That’s just data.
Try this: Instead of telling yourself you “have to be loyal,” let yourself get curious. Use this as a journaling prompt to reflect: What if you did leave? What would you do next? What would your ideal work day look like? What kind of functional work would you actually be doing? Sometimes imagining a different reality is the first step toward creating it.
4. Careers are designed by acting, not overthinking.
I used to think I had to map out the whole plan before making a move.
Now? I know that clarity doesn’t come from thinking harder. It comes from doing something.
Bold professionals don’t wait for the perfect plan. They take small, intentional steps toward the life they actually want… even if they’re not 100% sure yet.
They act like designers: by thinking in short-term hypotheses, testing those hypotheses, gathering data, and adjusting the assumptions.
(I’ll teach you the exact method for this in my program launching this fall.)
You don’t need to have it all figured out.
You just need to get in motion.
Because confidence? Direction? Alignment? They’re built in real time—by trying, tweaking, and moving forward.
Try this: What’s one tiny action you can take this week? Sending an email, scheduling a coffee, starting that first newsletter draft… anything that moves you closer to a life that feels like yours? Do that. Let the next step reveal itself from there.
5. It doesn’t have to ‘look impressive’ to be impressive.
The best career for you might not come with a blue checkmark, a Fortune 500 logo, or a shiny job title.
It might look like more space. Less management responsibility. More creative freedom. More energy at the end of the day.
The point of career design? It’s that you get to define your own version of success.
It’s not a paycheck, a title, or a promotion. It’s the feeling of living a life that’s beyond your wildest dreams.
What makes it valid? That it works for you.
Try this: Ask yourself: If no one could see my job title, what would I want to do all day? Journal about that. See what you learn.
The Takeaway: You don’t have to “suck it up” to succeed.
You don’t need to grind your way to burnout, fake your ambition, or sacrifice your mental health just to be seen as serious about your career.
You can build a path that feels good in real life and not just on paper.
And when you do?
You stop settling.
You stop doubting.
You stop spinning.
You start moving forward with clarity, grounded confidence, and momentum.
You get your life back.
That’s what career design does.
I’ll see you next week, Bold Professionals!
XX,
Abbey
P.S. Introducing - The Bold Professional Method
A self-paced, signature program designed to help you:
Design your dream career — aligned with your values, energy, and real-life goals
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This isn’t a quick fix or a template to follow. It’s a mindset shift and a method.
Inside, you’ll find the exact tools, scripts, stories, and strategies I use with my 1:1 clients - and that I’ve used to rebuild my own career from the ground up.
Whether you're leaving something behind, pivoting into something new, or figuring out how to show up as a bolder version of yourself… this course was made for you.
You’ll get:
Lifetime access to every module and future upgrade
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Bonus trainings on nervous system regulation, managing up, and getting promoted without burnout
Doors open this fall. Waitlist gets first dibs, early-bird pricing, and access to exclusive bonuses.
This isn’t just about getting a new job. It’s about getting a new lease on your career. But more importantly, it’s about building a life that finally feels like yours.
Let’s design it. Together.
P.P.S. Recommend the Bold Professional to your Career Besties! ✨
This is the unfiltered diary from a career coach turned founder helping smart, ambitious professionals redesign their work and own their boldest season yet.
Career clarity, nervous system-safe ambition, and the occasional spicy truth about work, identity, and designing a life you actually like.
Follow along to learn about reclaiming your energy, income, and ambition — without pretending to have it all figured out.